It s a shame I've been sitting on this book for about two years now. A friend of mine gave me Never Eat Alone , by Keith Ferrazzi a couple years ago (thanks Rey), and it s been on my bookcase ever since. It was resting there not because I didn't want to read it, but because I already had so many others in the pipeline. I finally got around to reading it last month and I definitely recommend it. In very simple terms, Ferrazzi explains why networking is important and how to do it. From how to make call lists to planning dinners to personal branding to goal setting, it s all here. He also maintains a valuable blog .
Inevitably there will be times when you have setbacks or things don t go your way. Maybe you didn't get a job you thought you were sure to get. Maybe you lost a job unexpectedly, didn't win a contract, or lost a major client. Your car always seems to break down right after you've had some other unexpected expense. These kinds of situations immediately place us in crisis. They don t feel good, but sometimes they re what we need in order to grow. The beautiful thing about crises is that they force us to take a step back and reevaluate what s going on in our lives and rediscover what we truly want and need. When we get over that initial shock and feeling of disappointment, we might realize that maybe that job wasn't really the best for us anyway. Maybe, just maybe, that wasn't what you really wanted to spend your life doing. Maybe that friend was holding you back instead of pushing you forward. The way I deal with crises of these sorts is simple: If something doesn't go my way professionally, I try to create a situation that would be more rewarding than the situation originally planned. A while ago, I was offered a job that looked very promising. After I accepted the offer, they pushed the start date back three times, later informing me (via e-mail) that they wanted to bring me on in the near future but I should feel free to explore other options. I was extremely disappointed. I felt disrespected and angry, but decided to make the best of the situation and follow my dream of working internationally. I then flew to Santiago, Chile and had great professional and personal experiences I wouldn't have had otherwise. Later, reflecting back on the original opportunity, I realized that working for a company that avoids a start date three times and then can t pick up the phone to explain the situation is probably not where I need to spend my time. Use setbacks as an opportunity to put your goals in order and act on them. In the moment, it s difficult to look at a setback as temporary, but they are. They happen to everybody. It s how you respond to them that will determine how they affect you.
Before I start, let me thank Melissa Lojewski, for unknowingly let me steal this picture from her Facebook page.
I love this poster because it makes a strong and simple point: it is what it is. Why do we have to qualify everything? Sometimes a person is a person. Sometimes a phone is a phone. We love descriptions to the point where we often OVER-describe things. For instance, why does someone have to be “athletic for a woman,” “well-spoken for a black guy,” or “cool for a rich person?” Why can’t they just be athletic, well-spoken, or cool?
People often describe me as, “the whitest black guy I know.” I always ask what that means. As of yet, nobody has been able to explain. While I love to play basketball, eat chicken, drink Kool-Aid, and listen to R&B, I also love to read, write, start and participate in conversation, volunteer, and travel. Do any of these activities make me more or less black or white? I don’t think so. Last time I checked black and white were both still colors, not sets of behaviors.
Just this past weekend, my mother (whom I see about once or twice a year) came down to visit. I showed her around some of my favorite spots. We started the day in one of the most underserved areas in the city and ended at a wine bar. I felt comfortable in both.
Enough about me. Back to the poster. This poster is important not because it’s a “gay” poster, but because, well, it’s important. You can substitute “gay” within the poster copy for any other descriptor, (e.g., tall, short, disabled, black, white, emo, smart, athletic) and “marriage” for any other noun, (e.g., immigration, conversation, education), and it still makes sense. While there are many specific issues we need to address, sometimes we need to take a step back and see something for what it is. Sometimes it’s very complex. Sometimes it simply is what it is.
Liz Feldman is a comedian, presenter, actress, and writer. She is also the author of the blog This Just Out, which can be found here.
Normally, when I receive a solicitation letter, I roll my eyes and throw them away. The reason is they are normally nothing more than a mass mailed or emailed message. They lack both sincerity and personality. They haven’t taken the time to find out who I am, what I do, or why it would make sense to work together. I’m sure the success rate is high enough (otherwise I’d assume they would quit), but it’s not a perosnalized experience at all.
When I received this letter from my friend Jake, I was excited after I read it and immediately called him to ask if we could collaborate on some projects and see where I could refer business his way. If we could take just a little more time to know our prospect, we will greatly increase our effectiveness.
This is an example of a great and personalized solicitation letter. I did receive his permission to post this, and I fully recommend him if you need a writer for anything.
Example: Great Solicitation Letter - Written by Jake Negovn
